BOE: Trump to Replace Franklin on new $100 Bill

In a move that has left many scratching their heads, and others shaking their heads in disbelief, the United States Bureau of Engraving has announced that former President Donald J. Trump will be featured on the new $100 bill. The decision, according to Treasury officials, was made after careful consideration of “historical significance” and a desire to showcase “modern American leadership.” Critics argue, however, that this move is nothing short of an attempt by Trump to hijack US currency. “He likes to put his name on everything, and it is damn disgusting”, said Nancy Pelosi, former Speaker of the House.

The unveiling ceremony, held at Trump’s Mar-a-Lago resort and golf course, featured a giant replica of the new bill adorned with Trump’s unmistakable profile. Attendees were treated to speeches praising Trump’s “unmatched achievements” and “timeless appeal.” One speaker even went as far as to suggest that Trump’s face on the bill would “Make American Money Great Again.” Another insisted it is now time to etch Mr. Trump into Mount Rushmore.

“It’s a perfect fit,” remarked one Treasury official, struggling to contain a smirk. “Trump’s legacy is as golden as his hair, and now it’s immortalized on our currency.”

Predictably, reactions to the new bill have been mixed. Trump supporters have hailed it as a long-overdue recognition of a “true American hero.”

Economists have also weighed in, expressing concerns about the potential impact on the dollar’s value. “Putting Trump on the $100 bill is like putting a ‘Going Out of Business’ sign on our economy,” remarked one economist, only half-jokingly.

Despite the controversy, the Treasury remains steadfast in its decision. “This is about celebrating the best of America,” declared the Treasury Secretary, who notably struggled to keep a straight face during the announcement. “And what’s more American than a billionaire reality TV star on our money?”

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